how I'm doing...

Life is so busy...and I'm so thankful for the energy and strength that God gives me on a daily basis even when things are hectic. I wonder sometimes what I would do without Him and the love that He pours out to us.

My friend Kasey and I attended the Rascal Flatts and Kellie Pickler concert...before it began, and the days leading up to it, I was filled with so much fear... After all of these health problems I've had, and the scares I've had with feeling like I could faint, pass out, etc. in even the air conditioning -- I was so nervous that I would pass out in the heat especially. It was so hot outside, and I was so afraid that the inevitable would happen. Sure enough, before we met Kellie, I felt awful...I felt like I could have dropped to the ground any second...Kasey immediately told me to sit down, and I bought an ice cold bottle of water and sucked it down. A little later I felt a little better, but it was so scary. I'm so glad I was able to feel better after that and enjoy the evening....I give all the glory to God for that one! He is so good to me...

On the outside looking in, I look fine...I look like I feel great, but in reality I have many bad days. Days where I wonder how I am even going to get out of bed. And like today, it took me until almost 1 pm to get up. There are many days I keep everything inside, and sometimes when I feel bad I don't tell a single soul...but the One who needs to know, knows. Thank you God. I'm so grateful...grateful that when I'm at my weakest, God gives me strength.

So, I guess I could say that I'm doing alright...considering. I'm just living each day and trying not to take anything for granted. I'm doing all that I can, pushing myself as much as possible, and depending on God to get me through it all. And with the help of amazing family and friends, I'm gonna make it.

Meeting Kellie Pickler

My friend Kasey and I went to the Rascal Flatts, Kellie Pickler, and Chris Young concert with no intentions of meeting any of them. We went expecting very little, and recieved more than we could even begin to ask for! We arrived to find out we would be meeting Kellie Pickler and Chris Young that evening. We were VIPs and were able to meet and greet Kellie and Chris. We talked to them, hugged them, got pictures with them. We ate BBQ with the other VIPs, sang Happy 24th Birthday to Kellie, and ate her cake! Kellie is soo sweet, and I was so thrilled to have met her! It was incredible! All of it was topped off with incredible performances by Rascal Flatts, Kellie Pickler, and Chris Young! I am on cloud nine! I'm so pumped....and I still can't believe this happened, but I'm thankful, and excited beyond belief! What an amazing day filled with events I'll remember forever! Special thanks to Kasey for making this happen! :)

What I've learned . . .

I have so much to say and so much going on in my head, yet I don't even know how to put it all into words, I'm hoping that if I just start typing words will begin to flow. One thing I'm extremely thankful for is that God knows our prayers even when we don't have the words to say them. God knows our mind, He knows our every thought, and He most importantly knows our heart. What a great thing.

I had a New Year's Post earlier this year, and since 2010 is halfway over, I thought I'd reflect a little. Here are a few things I've learned.

1. Jesus is always with me. I've know this forever, but I feel like this year I have been more dependent on Jesus than ever. No matter what struggle I'm facing, how bad I feel, or what difficulty lies ahead, I am overwhelmed with peace knowing that Jesus is with me and He will not leave me nor forsake me.
2. God is bigger than every conflict, difficulty, weakness, struggle, or sickness. I'm thankful that whatever problem I have, God is bigger than it, and with God ALL things are possible!
3. Memories are something you can hold onto forever. "A good memory is one that can remember the day's blessing and forget the day's trouble."
4. Don't worry about anything, pray about everything. I've wasted too many days worrying, and I'm slowly but surely learning that through prayer your worries can disappear.
5. You can't change other people, but you can strive to be more like Jesus so they see Jesus in you.
6. "If God is with us, who can stand against us?" Ain't God good???
7. "Sometimes we want God to change our circumstances, but God wants to use our circumstances to change us." I cannot begin to explain how much this quote has helped me. Makes me realized that it isn't my plans for my life, but rather God's plans for my life.
8. I've realized who means the most to me, who will always be there, who has my back, and who truly loves me for me. "A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities." --sounds like Jesus to me.
9. I've learned that some people only tear you down, whereas true friends are there to build you up. We need to surround ourselves with people who lift us higher.
10. "Life is meaningless only if we allow it to be. Each of us has the power to give life meaning, to make our time and our bodies and our words into instruments of love and hope." - Tom Head
11. Jesus can change your life, if you let Him.
12. God is good, ALL the time! Even on our darkest of days when we think things can't get any worse, God's love shines through.
13. Life isn't always easy, if life was easy - why would we need God?
14. Our perspective and attitude can make a world of difference.
15. Faith can do absolutely anything. Nothing at all is impossible with Jesus. This song is a great reminder of that.

"What Faith Can Do" - By Kutless

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think its more than you can take
But you are stronger, stronger than you know
Don't you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

It doesn't matter what you've heard
Impossible is not a word
It's just a reason for someone not to try
Everybody's scared to death
When they decide to take that step
Out on the water
It'll be alright
Life is so much more
Than what your eyes are seeing
You will find your way
If you keep believing

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

Overcome the odds
You don't have a chance
(That's what faith can do)
When the world says you can't
It'll tell you that you can!

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do
That's what faith can do!
Even if you fall sometimes
You will have the strength to rise

school's out for summer....

Summer came after months of anticipation and waiting. After a week of stressful exams, God rewarded me with the happiness of grades that impressed me after I doubted myself multiple times...He showed me that 'impossible is not a word, it's just a reason for someone not to try.' He showed me that my times of trials and obstacles can be rewarded with triumphs and victories.

I don't think any school year has ever been so difficult. Each day felt like it knocked me down and left me feeling weak. I don't think I have ever in my life wanted to give up so much. I don't think I have ever had to push myself so much to keep on going. Through all the sicknesses, dr appts, and not knowing....it wasn't an easy year. Classes weren't a piece of cake... BUT, God showed me that ALL things are POSSIBLE. He showed up and showed out many of times when I needed Him, and even times I thought I could do it all on my own, but in reality, couldn't. God IS my strength. He has taught me so much this year....

And He has brought me a summer that will be full of love, laughter, life, and memories.

Ain't God good??? :) I am so thankful. Thank you to all my friends, family, and prayer warriors....and thank you God....

May 22, 2005

May 22nd of 2005, five years ago, I placed my faith in Jesus. I was 10 years old and in the fifth grade, life was good, but there is always that longing for something 'more.' The something more I needed was a relationship with Jesus. I had been in church all of my life, but had never had a TRUE relationship with Him. I learned about Him, loved Him, loved church, etc....but it wasn't until that year (2005)I really got serious about it.

At the age of 10, I can't say I was really all that serious considering my age, but I can say that my relationship with Christ has grown tremendously in these five years. He loves us so much, and is bigger than any health problem, confict, issue, or sickness.

I realize it isn't May 22nd. I'm slightly behind....and I hate I missed such a milestone, but I was reminded of this special day today. This guy in my class, the farthest thing from serious, brought up God, church, and religion. He asked what the difference was between any old day of the week and Sunday. To which my friend replied, "Sunday is the day devoted to God. And He can change your life." He didn't want to believe a word either of us said, and continued by saying, "What is so great about God anyway? Prove to me he exists and I'll believe you." He didn't want to believe it. Surely there isn't a Heaven? Surely God isn't worth it? Surely there isn't more to life? You can fill that empty space in your life and in your heart. There IS a God who is loving and forgiving. There IS a heaven. God IS worth it. There IS more to life.

I couldn't be more thankful for what God has done in my life. He's changing me....into a better person. The best thing I ever did was say that simple prayer. May 22nd, 5 years ago changed my life. God has made everything worth it. He's made everything bearable, and He's made running this race a whole lot easier.

On August 14th 2005, I was baptized. I professed my faith, for my family and church to see. What a great thing....so grateful to be celebrating 5 wonderful, amazing years ALL because of Jesus!